so this one time, in vietnam, i was drunk. at 4:30am. i was drunk. but hussh-up you. that’s neither here nor there. this post is to post about two things. things i probably wouldn’t have the ballz to post about if my head wasn’t spinning.

so. there i was, sitting on this beautiful beach with a boy from the isle-of-man. [did you know they have their own currency? because i did not. also, did you know they’re not part of england? because I did not. oh, and. do you know where they’re located? because i do not…] anywho, marc (with a c), from the isle-of-man and i were sitting under the biggest, brightest stars one had ever seen, on a beautiful, golden sand beach in vietnam, talking about this, and that. and then he kissed me. so i kissed back. obviously. because it was fun. and lalalalal. then. then he goes, where’s your hotel? and I can’t remember (actually) and a switch goes off in him. to which i say, did you honestly think i would sleep with you?  and his answer… well, you have a nose piercing.

umm wha?

second story.

so, I met some australians (shocking) and am traveling down the coast of Vietnam with them. they’re nice. i like them a lot. but. but one of the girls is anorexic. i’m certain of it. i swear. so the first night she met the group (at breakfast over waffles) she told us she was super hungover and thus couldn’t eat. legit. so legit. we’ve all been there. then. then she claims the food in vietnam is getting to her. but it’s been 7 days now and really truly the girl has hardly eaten anything. like, at all. i think i’m the only person who has picked it up (silly boys), but it’s bad. so bad. and she is tiny. so tiny. gaunt and too skinny for anyone’s own good. it’s hard to look at her. she looks sick. too skinny. so yes. i’m constantly battling myself not to eat everything in sight. while she’s battling herself probably to try and eat something. anything. two extremes. two girls with issues. she always has an excuse not to eat. i always have an excuse to eat. people are different, so different. but i watch her. a lot. it interests me if i’m telling you the truth. the excuses. the lies. the constant stories as to why she can’t eat. it must get exhausting. mind you, constantly eating everything, then your mind filling with regret is exhausting too.

those are my stories. takes as you will…

wouldn’t it be nice to be able to look in the mirror each morning and be inspired by yourself? be inspired to eat well and not just sit on your butt all day, as apposed to reading weight loss magazines, weight loss blogs, weight loss stories, stories about other people finding inspiration through some means? wouldn’t that be nice?

to stand in the mirror and be inspired by myself, what I wouldn’t give for that…

because life would be easier then. simpler. i’d realize each morning it’s all about me. i can do this. i will do this. today is my day. it’s about self improving yourself, and not looking to others for inspiration. to listen to what matters to you; what do you want? you can do it.

inspiration from others is slippery and whimsical. it can vanish the second things get hard. food is in front of you, or the going gets tough. to capture your life’s ‘wants’ and ‘desires’ and turn them into your own, personal inspiration, to change your own life, each morning, just a little bit towards he better, my god, I wish I could do that.

• There are some seriously fashionable tourists in Vietnam. They’re really cramping my whole “whatever-I’m-traveling-style.” Also, I only brought eyeliner and mascara with me (because Julia Roberts said those two things make a girl feel prettier), whereas other girls seem to be carrying their MAC makeup artists in their bags.
• Free WiFi is everywhere in Vietnam. Slash, the world. EVERYWHERE. Facebook is blocked here, but being the magical Googler that I am, I decoded my IP to Washington. #win
• White people tourists seem to all go to the same white people tourist spots. Like, right now, I just had lunch in a cafe-type-place, and I could honestly be in North America. #TouristLose
• After three skype dates with my parents I have managed to hide my nose piercing. I wonder how long I can fool them…”sorry mom, I lost all my photos of that trip…”
• Motor bikes. I must learn and conquer the motor bike.
• Steps to losing weight: Step One —>go to Vietnam and be too cheap to buy food. That being said, the food I have eaten in Vietnam has been some of the best of my life.
• I am officially vegetarian. Have been since I left. This includes all seafood. I know, I know, how will I culture myself in food? But for reals, I’m the world’s pickiest eater, this way it’s easier for everyone, and I won’t offend anyone. That being said, I swear my hair is falling out at a quicker rate due to my new vegetarianism.
• Hanoi, Vietnam is so organized compared to Kathmandu, Nepal.  Road names? Check! House numbers? Check! Cars on their side of the road? Somewhat Check! Real toilets? Check mate Hanoi, Check mate.
• So in Nepal, I took a second 2 day hiking trip with a friend to a monk monastery. I walked through some of the smallest, poorest, little villages I had ever seen to get there. Then I arrived at the monastery (please keep in mind this story is from my perspective) and the wealth of the monks compared to the people was astronomical. I was shocked. The monks lived in a mansion-type place, all with bling-bling gold watches, iPhones, and even iPads(!)… just, compared to the people in their area? they were kings.  Then, when I went to the Hyatt, I saw 3 monks there!! Including one in the spa, and one on his facebook. I was so confused… as this went against all my white-person-naive-traveler-thoughts of monks.  So I asked a local person. And he goes, “I don’t like it. One bit. The monks take the people’s money. It’s corrupt.  Other religions. They’re good. Budhusism - it’s corrupt. They shouldn’t be at the Hyatt with our donations. They buy things too many things with donated money.” I told him I didn’t think it was just Buddhism, but all religions, in some form or another, someone, somewhere is benefiting. But yes, I thought that was very interesting as I always respected the religion of Buddhism thinking it was one of the last decent religions left… but I sadly saw otherwise. I also (remember folks: my blog. my thoughts) changed my view on Buddhism… dare I say it? I found it a fairly self centered religion. Like, it’s all about bettering one’s self. Not really helping others. Which I personally found was reflected in the areas.  I know Laos is quite Buddhist too, so I’ll be interested to see if my (very open) mind changes once again. ((note: I am really not religious in any way, so these are just my observations).
• So when I quit my job, and was hiring the new person for my own my position, my boss told me to, “hire someone just like you, well, someone just like you after your trip.” I didn’t understand what he meant. I now do.  I am gaining a backbone while traveling - one has to, I suppose. It’s good, as I seriously suck at sticking up for myself and I let people walk all over me the whole time. For example one of my friends owes me $540, and I have no backbone to ask her for it…. ugh. And, I worked at my job for four years and never had the balls to ask for a raise, even though all the guys made way more than me doing the exact, same, thing. UGH.
• I was sent one of those “anti-blogger” sites yesterday, and guess who they mentioned?! Me! me! me! They were insulting me, which truly didn’t bother me (whatever, I like boys, and am young and sexy (ha!) so let me enjoy my life. jeeesh), actually, I was amazed at how closely they had followed my life through Little Blog to discuss it in such detail.  People have a lot of time on their hands… like, a lot.
• Traveling is not a vacation.  Every day, night comes. Every day. Which means every day you need to find a place to snooze. It gets tiring. The moving of the things, the searching, the looking.  I’m somewhat thankful for rain in Vietnam - allows some guiltless down time.
• So my last day at the Hyatt in Kathmandu I did nothing. Literally, nothing. Which lead to me being bored out of my mind and missing home a lot, but anywho, when one sits by the pool for the day alone, it invites others to come chat. And chat the rich people did.  I spoke to a couple from Alberta, Canada who were flying around the world in their ‘private jet,’ and he said ‘private jet’ to me so nonchalantly as if everyone and their mother had a private jet. I, do not have a private jet. And again, just like in Croatia, I find very rich people like wearing all white. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s to let us average people know they have the money to wash their super-white clothes a lot, because they are always so, so clean. 
• Then, some other super rich people invited my friend-less ass to dinner with them at the Hyatt’s most expensive restaurant. I couldn’t say no as I had just been saying how I had nothing to do. It was a 5 stars fancy-pancy restaurant, and I was so awkward in my leggings, with my messy hair, nose piercing, no makeup, and green scarf, but then, when the bill came, I had to pay for myself. Which I realize, sounds bad to say, but really, isn’t the protocol to pay for someone’s dinner if you invite them to a restaurant, when obviously it is well out of their usual price zone? Me thinks so. Even after the conversion it was so pricey and made me feel sick to my stomach I had dropped that much on a single dinner. Sigh…
• Leggings. I have embraced leggings. With all my heart I now live in them, and am sad I thought was too fat in Toronto to wear them. They’re amazing… !!
• Yesterday in Vietnam I saw a really large tourist  (from her accent - North America) girl.  I stood behind her in line to get food.  I was rude and stared and ease dropped and was in awe of this girl.  I’ve wanted to travel (to do this trip!) since I was 18.  I would never (ever!) have gained the courage to had I not lost my weight.  I was way too self conscious when I was bigger. Even now, still having the last 25 to lose makes me self conscious - I constantly think the local people are judging me, the “fat tourist” girl wobbling around their hood. Ugh.  Anywho, I was impressed. I am impressed.  I wish I had lived my life more when I was bigger. Not always being scared of the world. Scared of life. Because I was. When I was 200+ pounds I felt I didn’t deserve to do awesome things. So yea, I was rude and stared at this girl yesterday, but was impressed she was in Vietnam. Impressed she was traveling.
• Thank you so much for all the votes!!!! I lost, but second place is so the first loser - so win!! And, for all those who have asked lots (lots!) of photos and posts are coming about Everest. A rainy day in Vietnam will do that for you… :)