It was the best year of my life. And the hardest.

And a year filled with exploring, creating, and a rollercoaster of highs & lows. It’s been a challenge and an adventure. Losses & lessons, and trial & error. It’s been filled with making new friends, and trying new things. New love and then a broken heart. But these aforementioned adventures, experiences, and new people in my life have changed me; shaped me, my perspective, thoughts, goals and philosophies. And I am a better person for it. And no blog post, no words, sentences, or feelings could express how thankful I am I moved to Melbourne, Australia somewhat on a whim in twenty twelve.

I changed. So much. And for the better. I am so much stronger, and wiser, and more mature than I was this time last year. I am a better person overall from making that bold decision, and although there are certainly things I would have done differently, I wouldn’t have wanted to stray from where I am today (breakup included). 

One of the blessings (and curses) of keeping a blog is having everything documented. From the little things, to the big. And although I don’t venture into the abyss that is my archives often, when I do it’s so apparent to me how I’ve changed. The person I am today is so different from the person I was when I was twenty four, and I credit most of that to travelling & moving to Australia. It forced me to grow up, smarten up and believe in myself. From opening bank accounts, getting a new phone, a place to live, a job, and finding friends, I have grown in ways I didn’t know possible. And I became fiercely independent. I think that’s why I’m doing okay during this breakup period. And that’s why I felt confident in telling people, “I was dumped.” I know who I am. What I like, what I don’t, and I’ve kinda, sorta, maybe come to realize in the past year that I’m pretty damn great.

And I lay in bed last night, feeling sad about the whole Matt situation, and for a split second I wished it was different… but then I didn’t know what “it” was. I like my life right now; my job, my friends, my house, my CrossFit, my city and I have learned so much about myself from my relationship with Matt, and the breakup, that I wouldn’t change it even if I could. And I like how my upcoming months are filled with the unknown; so many possibilities everywhere I look.

And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to still lose weight, but something has changed in the past months and I don’t think of my body as disgusting anymore; rather, just big; and I’m really (really) thankful for that. And I love how I *want* to run the Chicago Marathon this year, want to settle down, want to live and stay in Toronto, want to write a book, want to be single, and just have a big, fabulous, wonderful, year of me, and I credit this to the past 13 months in Australia. 

They were so wonderful, and absolutely, without doubt, the best thing my twenty seven-year-old self could have done. My confidence is up there, I am proud of my accomplishments, and my life, and although it’ll be sad (so sad) to leave Melbourne on May 7th, I know I’m ready, and I know the next year will be even better.