You can’t out-exercise a bad diet. Trust me, I’ve tried. I’ve run three full marathons for goodness sake, and attended five or six classes of crossfit a week (for months!) all without seeing the scale budge. And the only reason for that? I’m simply consuming too much.

From healthy, good food, to bad, junk food, my intake is simply too high. And I hate how I know this. I see this. Day in, and day out. I trick myself into thinking a short run, or trip to the gym justifies that cookie in a meeting, extra sugar in my coffee, a ‘whatever, who cares’ night out with my friends. It all adds up. It all adds up to me.

And of course I already know how to lose weight, I’m not stupid. Or wait, perhaps I am, as stupid is, as stupid does. And was it Einstein who said the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over, and over again and expecting different results? Because then, you guys, I am insane.

I’ve kept it no secret my weight loss goals have been about vanity. I want to walk down the street in a white tshirt and jeans and feel good, look good. I don’t want to have to pull my top out of my stomach when I sit down. Or reach for the nearest pillow for my lap on the couch. I want to shop in regular stores, and buy regular clothes. I want to feel hot, feel good, feel pretty. I don’t want to feel like a constant loser (well I do, but not in that way) all the time wearing black.

But then with weight loss there comes a certain point where my desire to lose weight to look better, is overshadowed by the need to start taking care of my body. I’m at that point right now. I want a healthy body, a fit body, the best 27 year old body I can have. I flexed (hush, don’t judge) my arm this morning and couldn’t believe how much fat was under my arm. Awful.

I’m not sure what the point to this post is, I suppose I’m just struggling these days to find the motivation to back-away-from-the-cookie, and I’ve realized once you take a step away from self-control (as I did when travelling), it’s 10 million times harder to regain it back…. but I am determined! I want a healthy body, one I’m proud of, one I check out in reflections as opposed to gasp in horror at, which means… I HAVE TO CHANGE SOMETHING.

And ultimately, I have to change my food intake. I have to reduce my food intake. I generally eat healthy meals, but my snacking is unreal. I find I have no self control when it comes to anything that’s in front of me. Yesterday we had a two hour morning meeting with Tim Tams (cookies) in this pretty jar on the table. I spent two hours obsessing over not eating any. I ate two. TWO. I was the only person in the meeting who ate any. What the what? But I justified it with crossfit, and my run that evening, and what I’ve realized this week is this: I’ve been trying to out-exercise my bad diet. Which, of course, is impossible.

So, dear blog, I come to you, if you had to give my struggling soul a little advice, what would your top lose-weight tip be? How do you find motivation not to eat all the delicious food everywhere?  Help me, please!?